LAS VEGAS, the location scout, part one :

you know that katy perry song "waking up in vegas"?

yeah, me neither.

who the hell listens to her anymore, anyway?

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so jim and lyle and parker and i went to vegas

to do a little location scouting

for a little project.

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and we all know,

there is no place like vegas.

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guess where we stayed?

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i will say the locations were impressive.

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strawberry rhubarb moment didn't suck either.

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and we got some small revelry in.

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an homage to foie gras macaroons :

oh dear jim and lyle,

how you pamper and surprise us.

with your outdoor fetes,

your plaid shorts,

your jaunty friends.

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and your platters of delicious

FOIE GRAS STUFFED MACAROONS.

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yes, this is the proper way to imbibe them.

pinkie UP, people.

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the fellow behind me is tim johnson.

he is married to the lovely blonde, mika, who is in the shot above with me.

he is looking at me here because he is admiring my

"nonchalant yet intentional" lean.

posture is everything to a tim johnson.

i know this from years of experience.

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oh lyle.

don't be so surprised that i know these things.

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POOL PARTY. EYE CANDY. FRIED CHICKEN. MARGARITAS. DSQUARED. MODELS. BFFS. MIRRORED SUNGLASSES. it's saturday.

let's just say a friend of a friend 

generously offers you the use of their pool on saturday.

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and you think, nice, we can all go lounge, 

celebrate the end of "landis week", 

and catch some rays.

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let's just say friend of friend 

didn't mention the house looked like THIS:

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i know, right?

perfect!

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thank god jim and lyle remembered to bring hats:

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and blow up toys.

no pool party is complete without blow up toys.

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monkeys in the pool.

all kinds of monkeys in the pool.

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from the top:

clump o' monkeys,

drunky monkeys,

drowny monkeys,

pre-teen monkey,

hunky monkey,

funky monkey.

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tim's food was outrageous.

the theme was "a judd family picnic",

so, popeye's fried chicken and chicken sausage gravy,

assorted foo foo salads (that's the ashley judd part),

margaritas, and cheesecake.

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you should have seen those gay boys eat fried chicken.

it was like the eagle on a school night.

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brandon and i felt our sunglasses were outrageous, as well:

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you can see a damn story in the lenses.

can you spot the jim and lyle?

can you spot the moldavian manse?

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it was a dreamy, long, sunny, day.

and in the end, there's nothing much better than your buddies,

an insane pool,

and the time to enjoy them both

to wrap up a week of celebration.

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THE HOLY WEEK OF LANDIS STARTED WITH EVELYN -

as most good events in our lives do.

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the girls were insanely excited to see their auntie E

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there was the mandated "window shopping"

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damn paparazzi.

a mandated lunch with "porn lips" jim.

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and one glorious, giggly, bubbly infused dinner at Ortolan.

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witness the lobster "spaghetti".

lobster in a champagne truffle cream sauce, encased in spaghetti, topped with osetra caviar.

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followed by birthday cake.

and porn lips.

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