things i learned at the los angeles AICP party :

um . . .

let's see . . .

1) don't wear a NAVY prada suit jacket.  no one will get it.  everyone will think it is black, like every other guy's jacket.  they won't even see the warped shawl collar lapels.

2)  don't have as many vodka 7UPs as kira.  see picture above.

3)  don't mock isadora's charity tent by licking the metal bottle for the camera.  it WILL end up on facebook.  it WILL taste like painted metal.

4)  don't tell brooke that the woman in the short dress with the big thighs is oscar de la hoya.  she WILL turn and ask "where"?

5)  don't act so surprised that everyone hasn't seen tommy lee's dick in the sex tape with pam anderson.  even when he walks past you and you smile knowingly and they ask why.

6)  don't assume the go go dancers will be as hot as the ones in montreal.  or paris.  or key west even.

7)  do go home early. 

sigh.