the gradual descent into hell known as: DASLU

we had a down afternoon.

how were we to know the horror that was about to be unleashed on us?

DASLU, the store in sao paulo, is a bit legendary,
supposedly a mix of maxfield's in los angeles and barney's in new york.
filled with fab, as they would say.

and it starts out pretty promising. there is an enormous christmas explosion as you walk in:


there's enough marble to choke the most nouveaux of the riche:


there's staff. lots and lots and lots of staff:


an odd addiction to teddy bears, but ok:


and then, getting excited. . . a full on mirror ball helicopter
suspended from the central atrium, with an orchestra playing christmas music under it.
not a quartet. an orchestra.
not a mirror BALL, a mirror HELICOPTER:



then there were all these semi-cute dog statues.
take that with a grain of salt, i'm missing grr and avec at this point a ton:



and look. . . more helicopters:



aaaaaand more bears:


and . . . wait for it . . . more . . . bears . . .



and OH HOLY GOD SAVE ME WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING?????


AAAAAAAA!!!!! THERE'S MILLIONS OF THEM IN GLASS CASES!!!! RUN!!!!


and just when you ran panting into the women's wing:


i kid you not, it was like dynasty had collided with barbarella. the ensuing mess of crappy mannequins with bad wigs and "doll museum" creepiness was enough to put us off eating for like, two hours.

what?

it's just a store people. there is steak to be eaten in this country. LOTS OF STEAK.