Friday, March 14, 2008

ode to a "moon" bag -

i have an odd affinity for all things moon related.

(DO NOT SEND ME MOON CRAP. no moon plates, no moon cookies, no moon franklin mint collectible dolls. you know how you mention to someone, oh, i don't know, that at one point in your life you were really into unicorns? this is just an example. it obviously would never have been me. and then suddenly they gave you, like, a unicorn figurine. and someone else gave you a unicorn plush animal. and you look up and the buggers are multiplying. so ixnay on the oonmay apcray.)

i think it's because i was born on the day the first men landed on the moon. true story.

my grandfather actually debated watching them land and watching me. seriously.

i can barely believe it.

he then suggested that they name me "moon". "moon smithers".
i swear, sometimes i am amazed i survived my family. i mean, they're sweet as hell, but i think there are times they just need to put DOWN THE GIN AND TONICS.

luckily, my mother wasn't drinking when she had me. granted, apparently she drank while i was baking, but it was the sixties, she was glamourous, and there were parties to be thrown. she did quit smoking. i think in the second trimester.

still, look, i'm here, i'm functional. and i'm not named "moon", so let's all give her a little slack.

so, all my life i've had a thing about the moon.

oh yeah, and i'm a cancer, so kinda, you know, ruled by the moon. phases. moody. gravitational pull on objects.

where the hell am i going with this post?

oh yeah, moon.

connie just bought the new balenciaga "lune" bag.


i HATE her.

7 comments:

- said...

please post pictures of unicorns.

The Guv'ner said...

oh my! Moon! You'd have had a hard childhood with a name like that, for sure. :) What a great day to be born though. I mean your birth date will forever be historical and fantastic!!!

Heh, Moon Smithers is making me sing "MOOOOOON RIIIIIIIIIIVER" and that is never a good thing.

I bought a tank top in ON yesterday and immediately thought of you... See what you've done to me?

CBang said...

I know you're out there somewhere
'Cause I've held you in my dreams
And I'm waitin' for the day it all comes true
So close and yet so far away
You'll be more than just a dream some day
I'll hold you in my arms but 'till I do...

I'll wait until the rivers run dry
If it takes a million years "lune bag"
I will know a million years can't come too soon
Somehow, somewhere our eyes will meet
(at Barneys New York or Balenciaga on 22nd St) and then and there
The sparks will set a magic night on fire
And I'll lasso you the moon.

Alice Olive said...

Hilarious! You have more than survived, dahling!!

Yeah, know what you mean about the moon thing and then receiving ridiculous items... It's actually quite frightening sometimes - can make you think twice about some of your friends...

Anonymous said...

I just mooned you. Happy?

Whiskeymarie said...

Ooh...pretty bag.

I'm totally sending you moon-themed throw pillows.
And moon pajamas.
And a moon wall tapestry.
And moon undies.
And...

Gretta said...

My aunt did that to me with cat-items. I have A cat - one cat. I like him. I do not, nor have I ever liked/wanted: cat stationery, ceramic cat eyeglass holder (???), cat refrigerator magnets, etc.

However, if I mention that I "have a thing" for Balenciaga bags, please feel free...